matcha for the mind

Change is inevitable: While it may seem easier to stay in the comfort of a well-kept routine, change will eventually prevail. A lot of the time, change comes at the most unexpected times. From something as small as your schedule, to something as major as moving homes, getting accustomed to change is often difficult; life felt so much simpler before, afterall! In short, we get used to what was, and attached to traditions. Turning away from change doesn’t help; the world is constantly changing around us, whether we like it or not.

I realized this, when I went through one of the biggest and unexpected changes in October last year, which was losing my friend group. The close tight-knit bonds we had with each other was something I didn’t realize I would lose so soon. I had spent so much time texting and hanging out with them that they were a big part of who I was as a person and when I lost them it felt like I lost a huge part of myself. I wasn’t sure how I would recover and move forward from this change and then I realised that there are some things that we just can’t control, no matter how hard we try. Constantly worrying and being anxious over a situation that can’t be controlled will not change anything. So for me in that situation I decided to remind myself that it was not my fault and the best thing I could do for myself was try and get past this fallout.  Sometimes, it feels natural to fall into a routine of obsessing and overthinking, even when there is no reason to keep on going with that endless cycle. 

However, the constant overthinking can take us away from the present. Rather than staying in the moment, you can end up spending too much time in your own head. It’s difficult to stop worrying about change, especially when dealing with a problem you can’t completely control. But letting the situation play itself out can have a very positive effect on mental health.

Even though I was deeply impacted, I still continued to try my hardest in school and create closer bonds with new people. I also practiced taking care of myself and taking the time to reflect on the situation. Luckily for me I was able to form new friendships with people who supported me through out this process. Of course, it is not easy to sit back and put anxiety on hold. Still, practicing self-care and allowing yourself to look back and move forward are the best ways to help you cope with change. Another important thing to remember is that you are never alone. It is always important to remember that you can talk to somebody. Talking to a close friend/ family member/ or trusted adult, can really help you get the support you need in a stressful situation. Even when change seems like an impossible obstacle to overcome, there is always a way through. Coping with anxiety and stress is not an easy task, but prioritizing your mental health will help you grow as a person and welcome change.

I turned 16 last week and I thought I would take this blog post as an opportunity to reminisce. I found my middle school journal yesterday and I think it is safe to say I was very different. I’ve experienced a lot of growth, as a person and a student, so here are four things I would tell my middle school self:

1. Create different friend groups

Hollywood movies have made us think that having a group of friends should be all you need. Yes, I did have that one group, and gave it so much importance that it became part of my identity. Losing that group of friends was hard by eye opening. I realized that decisions were never made as a single individual, but rather by the group. If you made your own decision, it wasn’t received well, turning the environment sour. Afterall, we’re all going through puberty and learning to be young adults; this can make things cantankerous and toxic as a result of lacking maturity among teenagers. Different friend groups will help you cater to different aspects of yourself so don’t be afraid to branch out. 

2. Competition is healthy, but not everything

Humans thrive off competition, it’s true. The problem that then emerges is that of unhealthy competition: friendships break, people cheat, and lie. In school, the most common question is, “What’s your GPA?” While it is everyone’s goal to get the highest score, it’s more important to get the highest score you can and you will be proud of. There will always be someone ahead, and someone behind. Compete to push yourself, but be happy for those who might excel more. Letting others’ success impact you will reverse your positive approach to competition. Being successful in school goes beyond the highest grades. 

3. High School is not High School Musical

The glitz and glamor of perfectly dressed high schoolers does not exist. People will not break into dance, they will not always have perfect hair, eyebrows, or outfits. In fact, looks are not everything. This is high school, not a beauty pageant. It’s crucial for us to remember that real life is not reel life. 

4. You’re not expected to know what you want

I have gone through about four different stages over my school career thus far. From drawing, to photography, to english, and psychology, my interests are always changing. School is the best place to explore your interests with the guidance of your teachers. Having found my joy for writing, I started this very blog that has now become my exploration of mental health and its manifestations in our minds. Keep an open mind for there is so much to explore and experience!

This summer I got the chance to go back to California after five years. Before going, I was curious how different the state was since the last time I went and wanted to see how COVID impacted California. To my surprise, California was pretty much exactly how I remembered it, and the only change was the extent of poverty I saw. I realized many people had lost their jobs due to the COVID-19 Pandemic. One of the times I witnessed poverty was when my mom and I went to a restaurant in Santa Monica and saw a homeless man pulling out food from the trash can close to where we were sitting I remember wondering why nobody else at the restaurant seemed to be bothered by it. To me, seeing a homeless person so close to me felt so strange and so rare. Looking back at this moment, I now understand why nobody else seemed to care, and that was because they were used to it. 

I’ve lived in Singapore for 11 years, and seeing poverty here would be considered an unusual encounter. The US has the second-highest rate of poverty among rich countries, while Singapore currently ranks the 26th most income disparate. COVID 19 impacted poverty in the US harder than in Singapore, as unemployment soared in the US causing their economy to suffer. While Singapore’s economy did suffer like most countries during the pandemic, the government was able to control this by introducing incentives and putting money into the economy.

In order to understand how Singapore did a better job of recovering from the pandemic versus other countries like the US, I decided to research more.

I found that the Gross Domestic Product (GDP) which is a measure of the value of the goods and services made in a country and is an indicator of the economic health of a country is an easy way to understand how well a country did during a period.

The US economy which had been on a record growth until 2019, experienced two consecutive periods of Gross Domestic Product (GDP) decline during COVID and also recorded its highest drop of 9.1% in its GDP in the second quarter of 2020 which has not happened since 1941. This shows that the impact of COVID 19 on the US economy was severe. 

The US also lost 9.6 million jobs due to COVID as compared to 2.6 million job losses in the European Union (EU) which has a larger population of 100 million people compared to the US.

It is also estimated that around 24 million Americans experienced hunger and 6 million feared being evicted from their homes.

On the other hand, Singapore’s recovery from COVID-19 was more rapid as its GDP grew to 7.6% in 2021 compared to a decline of 4.14% in 2020. Whilst Singapore also saw a significant increase in job losses to 196,400 as compared to its population of around 5.5 million, the recovery was much quicker due to the effective vaccination program of the government that resulted in almost 92% of the population being vaccinated compared to 67% of the US population. This allowed the government to quickly reopen the economy to allow foreign visitors, tourists to travel to promote tourism and also to further popularize Singapore as an important country in Asia for business.
This demonstrates that strong government controls and a higher vaccination rate is important to reduce the impact of a pandemic on an economy that results in job losses, poverty and homelessness.  

Social media has created unrealistic beauty standards that have led to low self esteem in teenagers today. The results of a survey conducted by the Royal Society for Public Health asking 14-24 year olds in the UK how social media impacted their well being proved that popular social media platforms lead to an increase of depression and anxiety in teens. “Editing apps such as FaceTune—which saw usage increase by 20% at the beginning of the pandemic and has over 1 million edited images exported daily—allow users to smooth, shrink and sharpen their way to perfection” ( Faibes, From ‘Instagram Face’ To ‘Snapchat Dysmorphia’: How Beauty Filters Are Changing The Way We See Ourselves). Apps like Facetune are commonly used by celebrities and influencers when posting on social media. When an insecure teenager scrolls on social media and only sees heavily photoshopped images of flawless people in their twenties, it’s hard for them to not compare their body to the body they see on the screen and wonder why they don’t look like that. Seeing photos of flawless people on our feed everyday has promoted unrealistic beauty expectations for teenagers. When I used to scroll on TikTok or Instagram I often found myself feeling disappointed when I realized I didn’t look like the girls who get over a million likes for just being pretty. But after distancing myself from social media and realizing that it wasn’t healthy to compare the body of a 15 year old girl who was still growing to the body of a model in her 20s , I found myself feeling more content with my appearance. 40% of teenagers said images on social media had caused them to worry about body image (Mental Health Foundation).  Teenage girls have become more insecure now than ever, due to the unrealistic beauty standards social media has created.  Have you ever told yourself you’re only going to go on your phone for five minutes but before you know it, it’s been an hour? Do you find yourself delaying tasks to look at your phone? Ever questioned why it is so difficult for you to put your phone down? Social media apps are designed for you to never want to leave them. So no, Instagram sending you four different notifications after you haven’t been on it for thirty minutes isn’t a coincidence. Social media apps use “the dopamine effect” which is, “our brain’s way of recording what’s worth doing again” (Brown, Trapped – the secret ways social media is built to be addictive). Dopamine is released in our brain after positive experiences such as receiving a good grade or taking a bite out of delicious food. Having a positive experience on social media such as receiving likes or seeing a funny video causes dopamine to release in our brains, making us enjoy the feeling of checking social media and wanting to do it more (Trapped – the secret ways social media is built to be addictive). This is one of the ways social media apps get us always wanting to be on our phone. So how can anyone not be addicted to social media when these apps are literally designed for us to constantly be on them? There isn’t actually a lot of complexity to this answer, the main way is to keep a life outside of social media. Unfortunately, most of the new generation has grown up on social media making them attached to their phones and nearly impossible for them to imagine a life without it.                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                        

In English class at school, we read an essay titled “Nowhere Man,” written by Pico Iyer in 1997. The essay centered around the author’s experience of being a third-culture kid and feeling indifferent during a time where there weren’t many third-culture kids. I agree with Iyer’s statement, but I do believe this isn’t always the case for everyone. The idea of not having a place to call home, which was the main topic of “Nowhere Man”, is something I can heavily relate to. I was born in the US but moved to Singapore when I was two and have been going to American/international schools my whole life. I identify as Indian since both of my parents are from India, but I myself have never lived there and often feel like a foreigner when I visit India. A line that really stuck with me in the essay was, “…, the America where I am registered as an “alien,” and the almost univisted India that people tell me is my home.” As an Indian-American living in a foreign country, I do often feel like an outsider due to the fact that there are only a few parts of Indian culture that I’ve been raised with. Though I relate to Iyer’s statement, I understand why many other third-culture kids do not. When this essay was written, it was 1997, and at that time, being a third-culture kid was rare. It’s been 25 years and it’s estimated that there are around 220 million third-culture kids in the world. Iyer clearly wasn’t surrounded by many people like him, and this is what caused him to feel indifferent. Iyer proves he feels mentally homeless, and in 1997, a time where social media barely existed, this feeling is understandable. Like I mentioned before, I often feel like an outsider when visiting countries like India. However, now with social media, it has become so much easier to identify with the rest of the world. Social media has helped me stay connected with my family overseas through seeing what’s going on in their lives on Instagram and being able to contact them through Whatsapp group chats. I also have the advantage of going to school with mostly third-culture kids whom I can relate to in some aspects. Recently  with Netflix shows like Never Have I Ever, Indian-American third-culture kids are getting more representation. These advantages have made it easier for me to feel a part of a society where not having one designated home is normal. Overall, I support Iyer’s statement, although only to a certain extent since I strongly believe times have changed.